It’s okay to feel lonely sometimes.
It’s okay to want to be loved.
And yet we are all so ashamed of loneliness. As though being associated with the label of the unwanted will somehow confirm our unworthy-of-company-ness, thus adding momentum to the descending wrecking ball of friendlessness as the un-lonely people find out and conclude that we are not worth the know because now they know that we once felt lonely.
So while we all feel it, none of us actually say it.
I think… that the desire to be loved is a healthy desire. The process of finding love?
LOL. As far as I understand, that can be a long and complicated process. A process that involves vulnerability, bravery, patience, understanding, wisdom and all the other hard stuff.
I don’t just mean romantic love I also mean friendships. True friendships – family like relationships – can cost just as much if not more time and intention.
It’s bloomin’ terrifying and honestly the thought makes me want to massively CBA.
But I guess (annoyingly) that’s what makes life exciting and beautiful.
Each season is beautiful in itself.
So yeah, I guess what I’m trying to say is that it’s okay to admit that you are excited for the winter snow while making the most of the summer sun.
And while I don’t feel lonely in this here particular moment – the truth is that I’m terrified to admit that I sometimes feel lonely too.
I’ve felt lonely while in a relationship. Lonely while at a party with the ‘coolest’ people. Lonely while sat at home on my own watching “To all the boys I’ve loved before” for the bujillionth time on Netflix. It’s a feeling. It comes and goes.
My relationship with God lets me know that I’m never alone, that I am loved and valuable. And honestly – when I intentionally pursue that knowledge it fills me with joy and peace and really does drive away any feelings of loneliness. I’m also learning to be more vulnerable, more kind to others and to myself. I’m learning patience and forgiveness and how to pursue people in a normal way loool because we really do need each other.
And d’you know what? It’s pretty cool! Especially because I think I’m slowly getting better at it and that’s awesome.
But just incase you ever feel lonely – don’t worry. It’s normal.
We all feel lonely and left out sometimes.
We’re just too scared to say it out loud in case you find out that we were lonely.